Mercury falling
50 degrees:
People in Florida crank up the heat.
People in Wisconsin sunbathe.
40 degrees:
People in Louisiana put on thermal underwear.
People in Wisconsin have picnics in the park.
30 degrees:
People in South Carolina shiver uncontrollably.
People in Wisconsin have one last cookout before the weather turns cold.
20 degrees:
People in Alabama put on overcoats, mittens, and earmuffs.
People in Wisconsin think about shutting the windows.
10 degrees:
New York landlords finally turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin switch from short to long sleeves.
10 below zero:
Californians move to Mexico.
People in Wisconsin start drying their laundry indoors.
20 below zero:
Texans are hospitalized with hypothermia.
People in Wisconsin take their winter coats out of storage.
30 below zero:
Politicians put their hands in their own pockets.
People in Wisconsin let their dogs sleep indoors.
40 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
Water…
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